Wednesday, January 30, 2013

A great explanation

I heard from a good friend an excellent explanation of what it feels like to have Fibro. She said it feels like you have been beaten all over with a hammer-everyday-over and over. That would explain the surface pain and muscle pain but still doesn't adequately describe the deep joint pain. I guess it depends on the force behind the "hammer beatings".
I have been accused of being a drug addict and laying around in a drugged stupor. This person only says this because they would prefer I do illegal drugs like Marijuana. I like to think of a saying I had posted in my room growing up. It said to "never judge a person till you have walked a mile in their moccasins". This saying is so true! You never know what a person is going through till you have been there, so dont even try. I thought about this persons accusations and I realized that the times I get sleepy are not from being overly medicated. It's the days I don't take some of my meds. The pain is so intense I become very tired just from trying to deal with it. Today I did not take my noon meds. I do struggle with fatigue from Fibro (or maybe I have Chronic fatigue) and I mistakenly think if I skip a dose of meds I might have a bit more energy. Today I wanted to get to some sewing after work. Well instead of more energy I was in so much pain I came home and fell asleep. When I woke up the pain was so bad it was difficult to get more than a shallow breath. It was like today's "hammer beating" took place while I was getting my much needed nap. My pain level even with meds is a 5 to 6. I would like a lower pain level but I am too afraid of the fatigue that may accompany it. Even though I have about one day a week that I fall asleep after work, I manage to make it to work 5 days a week and to church 1 day. I have managed with the help of my kids and roommate to keep our house clean. I have cleaned out the entire garage and the spare bedroom. I have since then cleaned out a storage building and filled the garage again but since I have unpacked an entire garage just before this I have faith I will get this one done as well. I had my entire Christmas decor put away by Jan 14th. This is a record for me. It used to take me till February even with help. I even had my friends come for the weekend last weekend. I have been exercising twice a day, and organizing every cupboard and drawer in my house. So in my opinion, I am doing fine, despite the hammer beatings, despite my pain meds that keep me out of ER, despite the cruelty of people who have not walked a mile in my moccasins.

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